So Wifey and I had a big fight last night :( It has been coming for a while, I kind of expected it because I know my wife. Before she got pregnant we would have a fight every month at her ‘time of the month’. (PS I have PCOS and rarely have a time of the month but when we both do at the same time look out!) The thing is Wifey tends to hold her emotions in, especially anger. She then yells at me for all the things I’ve done wrong over the month, and honestly it is usually the same crap. However, since she has gotten pregnant we haven’t really had any big fights. I knew this one was coming though because she was out of nowhere be a total bitch to me for no reason all weekend. She finally melted down last night and told me why she was angry.
The thing is, she does kind of have a right to be angry, BUT she should have been telling me about what was bothering her when it happened so I could rectify it sooner. I’ve tried to tell her she needs to tell me what she wants to happen or what is bothering her because I am not a mind reader. Women, eh, lmao?! As I suspected it had to do with my parents. My parents built a beautiful suite in their basement for us and made it so that it was very private. Well, it started out being private. Then my mom comes down and walks in yelling “hello” but she does not wait for a response, she just walks in. Or when we go to my in-laws house on the weekends they come down to see my cat and change the lights around. Or they ask if they can borrow some of our food. All these things have been getting to Wifey but she has not directly said so. After a not fun fight in which Wifey threatened to leave (I HATE it when she does that so much) she told me she wants more privacy from my parents.
So now I’ve got to have a talk with my parents, sigh. I really really don’t want to, but I have to for my wife and marriage. I have to tell them that it is okay for me to come up and ask for a cup of sugar but it is not okay for them to ask me. I have to tell them I’m going to lock the doors when we leave and please don’t come in. I have to tell my mother, again, not to just walk in the door, but knock and wait for a response. That we need privacy, that is the main reason we moved in, we didn’t have privacy living at my in-laws house. I told Wifey that we will move out by this time next year.
It sucks in a couple of ways. I didn’t realize how badly I missed being near my parents. I moved in with Wifey about seven years ago to a town about a two hour drive away. We would visit my parents maybe once a month for a weekend but my parents would never come visit us. They say it is too far for them to drive. It is partly that and partly that they are homebodies who are not the biggest fan of hanging around people who are not in their circle, including not liking my in-laws. Even so they are still my parents and I love and miss them. I wish we all lived in the same town, but that will never happen. I wish my wife and parents got along, but that rarely happens for anyone with their in-laws. I wish I had some balls (figuratively speaking) and didn’t dread talking to my parents and laying down the law.
Wish me luck...