So Wifey wouldn’t admit it at the time, but she finally started slowing down for about a week before she gave birth at 39 weeks. Anyone who has had kids has to kind of hate her for only slowing down at 38 weeks pregnant! Then on February 20th her hips really started hurting and she was crampy. She got in our amazing bath (not letting me shower I have to mention) and felt better. We went to bed and she woke up every hour with a contraction all night, thank goodness she was able to sleep through most of them though. When we woke up the contractions seemed so slowly progress, and though Wifey insisted it was probably just false labour, I was tracking them and saw that they were getting closer together. I tried to get her to sit on a ball or walk, but she was like “no that makes it hurt more!” Oh my stubborn wife!
She was finally having a contraction about every ten to fifteen minutes and seemed to be in quite a bit of pain. I have to clarify my wife is VERY tough, she works with men, lifting large weights, and does not cry easily, so when I say she was in a lot of pain it meant something. She STILL insisted it was false labour and that we were not supposed to go in to the hospital until they were 5 minutes apart. At that point I made her call the maternity ward and ask them. The nurse listened to Wifey’s voice during a contraction and told her to come in, especially because the hospital is about an hour away.
Then all of a sudden Wifey was upset I wasn’t ready to leave the house NOW! I had most everything ready but Wifey was not happy that I needed to do a couple things... like put my shoes on! Thank goodness for my dad, who had been watching Happy Baby all day while I cleaned the house, counted contractions, packed the car, and encouraged Wifey. We got in the car to drive to the hospital (PS I hate driving, especially long distances, I figured I would be so stressed and drive Wifey crazy). It turned out I was totally calm! Wifey even asked me later how I was so calm but I have no clue. Even when a hospital transport bus cut us off in the HOV lane, kept slamming on his breaks last second, and in general was a jerk.
We had texted our doctor and on the drive to the hospital she called and told us that the hospital would probably turn us away. We got to the hospital, park almost beside the jerk bus driver and walked the looong hike up to maternity. Who the heck puts it on the fourth floor way across the hospital?! We checked in and the nurse asked Wifey to pee. While Wifey was in the bathroom she turned to me and said “are you her sister?” You have no idea how many times I get asked this question... I rarely even get upset by it anymore. “No, I’m her wife” I said and the nurse got all flustered, then this look came across her face and she said “did you have a wild story about giving birth here before?” She was totally one of my nurses from Happy Baby, she remembered our car blowing a tire and Wifey falling in the ditch on the way to my c-section. She was totally awesome! She hooked Wifey up, checked her and said she was five centimeters dilated, we could stay at the hospital, yay!
The nurse went away to figure out what room she could get us and our doula/family friend showed up. She was SUCH an awesome help, I recommend everyone get a doula, especially if you are not allowed to have a midwife! The nurse came back and told us we got the best room in the hospital, one with a view (of the highway woo hoo) and a huge tub, plus the regular ametities of a bed for the partner, a large shower, birthing ball, bed that goes into a million shapes, and a fridge.
Once in the room I ran down to our car to grab all our bags (quite a few with two women plus I needed to pack food because I’m gluten free). Dropped my phone on the elevator where is shattered into three pieces, thank goodness for helpful Canadians picking them up and handing to me. When I got back Wifey got in the bath and Doula started pouring water on Wifey’s back. I sat at Wifey’s head, encouraged her, and talked to the nurses. We had gotten to the hospital at about five o’clock and by the time we were getting settled in the room there was a bunch of nursing changes. Some of the nurses sucked royally who I tended to snap at and others were awesome and remembered us from Happy Baby’s birth. One nurse in particular was not that smart in looking for baby’s heartbeat fyi baby’s heartbeat is NOT in Wifey’s ribs! One of the great ones got me the mouthpiece to the gas for Wifey to bite on so she would stop trying to chomp off her finger!
After a couple hours in the tub our family doctor showed up and wanted to check to see if Wifey’s water had broken, so we got her out of the tub and onto the bed. Doctor was pleased that Wifey was at nine centimeters, it was at this point they got the gas out for Wifey. Wifey proceed to be stuck at nine centimeters for two hours, not fun. The doctor finally “accidently” broke Wifey’s water and noticed meconium in the water, something that can be dangerous so a pediatrician was contacted and they started to monitor Lil Bub’s heart rate continuously. They noticed with each contraction his heart rate would go down. This bothered the nurses so they tried to get Wifey into a number of different labouring positions, much to Wifey’s displeasure.
My wife is a very sarcastic person, even in labour, and had a couple of one liners that had some of us rolling around laughing histarically. WARNING the two I’m about to tell you are naughty and some people may find disturbing, so you may want to skip this paragraph. Before her water broke the doctors asked what it felt like and she said “too many fingers” which I understood and laughed but had to explain to our doula. The way I explained it was “too much girth”. Oh dear. The second instant was when they got Wifey to get on this birthing stool that kind of looked like a large baby potty. My wife is a larger lady so her lady bits did not line up with the hole on the stool, so when the doctor went to check her there was no way she was going to be able to, well check her. My wife yelled “that’s my clit, that’s my clit, that’s my clit!” much to my doctors embarrassment and our doula ended up rolling around on the bed behind Wifey laughing. She also would respond to all doctors/nurses requests with “you can try.”
Finally our doctor pushed on Wifey’s cervix while Wifey bore down to be able to get Lil Bub’s head into a position where she could push. She was then able to push, but every time she pushed Lil Bub’s heart rate would go down. Again they tried different positions, all except hands and knees because Wifey refused. She proceeded to push for about two hours with just a bit of his head showing when his heart rate got so bad they called the OB and started to prep Wifey for c-section. PS they didn’t tell her or me that was what they were doing but I was listening carefully and understood. I started freaking out, both for her sake and Lil Bub’s. I’ve been through two c-sections and knew that was the one thing Wifey didn’t want. I was also worried for Lil Bub.
Right before the OB showed up however Wifey was able to push enough of Lil Bub’s head out that our doctor was able to get the vacuum on his head and start pulling. In one smooth motion Lil Bub’s head came out and I noticed a couple of things. First, he was face up (which means painful back labour), second he was white and it have me horrible flashbacks of losing our first son, and third his cord was wrapped around his neck. The doctors flew into action cutting the cord from around his neck, delivering him, and whisking him over to the pediatrician. My heart was in my throat but after making sure Wifey was okay I went over and the pediatrician said he was wonderful!
He was born at 11:29pm on February 21st 2013 and he was 7 pounds 8 ounces of adorableness! I was so proud of my wife, she did such an awesome job! I don’t know if I ever would have been able to do what she did that night. She is such a strong and amazing person, we are so lucky to have her. And I am so lucky to have two beautiful children whom I love so so much. Life is an amazing thing!
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PS Don't forget to like me on facebook: http://www.facebook.com/gaymomstraightworld